my brother

My brother is a crack addict. He lives on the street in New Orleans. He has done some things that some might consider unforgivable and despicable. But, he is my brother and I love him. I pray for him everyday. I pray that he should be warm and have food. I pray that he find some place safe to lay his head down at night. And I pray that he might ask for help. That's all I can do for him. I have to accept that he is sick and that unless he wants help I cannot force him to take it from me. But I can love him until he can love himself. Being an addict I know that until I was ready to surrender I could find no hope. I had to want to live more than I wanted to die. But once I honestly made that choice everything changed. Not overnight, but it changed. Maybe today my brother will have the courage to make that choice…and maybe not. It's his choice, not mine.

clear

Clear. How long can you stay in the moment? In this very minute could you remove all thought of the next moment…or next week? It's hard, sometimes impossible, to stay present. Everyday it's easier for me to stay out of the past...resentment, disappointment, regret...they hang in the past. But the future, next month, next week, tomorrow even two minutes from now…it's hard as hell for me to stay out of the future. Anticipation, anxiety, expectation, fear…they live in the future. They are the company I keep when I hang out in the future. Awareness of this moment frees me from those companions, allows me to really live! If I can be conscious of not where I am but when I am, perhaps I can then be conscious of my choices. I might make those choices count. Can you live in this extraordinary moment?